The Basement

I have said on here before that I am a basement dweller, which is no surprise to my circle of people. They are in fact, the ones who were able to finally make me see that for myself after all. So what is it about basements that appeals so much to me? Why am I so set on staying in the underground place that I have come to love so much yet despise for its very existence?

Let's start from the beginning:
What is a basement?

• S: (n) basement, cellar (the lowermost portion of a structure partly or wholly below ground level; often used for storage). Well, there's a start. A below ground place of storage. How fitting for me. It is by design a place to keep things. A place for putting things away. I find it to be a place of hiding.

• It is also described above as a cellar. A place to hide out while a storm is just outside above you tearing at what you would normally live in. Storms make living above ground unsafe. I also find the basement as a place of security. A place to hide in, and after several storms, you wonder if it is ever going to be safe above ground again. The answer is no, it will not be safe, but who will rebuild the house that has been destroyed if you stay in the basement? No one else has the ability to do reconstruction on a house belonging to you while you stay hidden underneath the rubble. But as a basement dweller, you do not experience life above ground in the primary house, so it becomes none of your concern.

I have been contemplating this post for a while now and so just this morning, I was thinking about what great things I could think of having come from basements or underground hiding. I found nothing that would help my case for staying underground at all. In fact, I thought of 2 specific things: 1. The Basement Birmingham- a group of young people who started worship and study in their actual basement and quickly spread ti to the public and now have a large influence over the young people of the city and are no longer tied to a basement because of their obedience. 2. The Underground Railroad- a system designed to allow those in captivity to run to freedom.
Interestingly enough exactly what I am to do.
We all have been or still are a prisoner of what we feel we desire most, whether it is hiding, security, importance, elevation, etc. Whether we find ourselves in a basement, tower, dungeon, throne, or any place other than the position of warrior for the kingdom, we are working for self worth.
I entertain the idea of being out of my basement from time to time and go upstairs, answer the door, and lock my basement door behind me, careful to slip the key securely in my pocket. You see, I do not want others knowing I even have a basement, let alone snooping around in it to see my secrets, wounds, shame, or even my great need for security itself. As long as I have the "freedom" to come and go in and out of my basement, I will chose mostly to stay in it, therefore foregoing the freedom I declare I have in my ability to choose. True freedom comes from handing over the key to God Himself and declaring that it is ok with me if He chooses to let the door be unlocked and flung open in all its darkness. That is the only way light will ever be in that place. I have a hard time with that because I still fear those "storms" that come so often, and I have not dealt with some of the boxes of things I have stored there and hold so tightly, and I cannot even begin to imagine the pain that would come with relinquishing my dwelling place of deep hiding and darkness. Have you ever been in a really dark place and come out to see that even small amounts of light are in fact painful?
I know that I am being asked to give up my basement and face the world and all its painful reality right now. Instead of being in solitary denial, I am being asked to choose facing it head on with a mighty host of heavenly warriors and The King as my army because this is in fact after all a Kingdom War with a Kingdom purpose!
Still hard to agree to somehow...

Written in Stone

So, tonight I was in a Bible study that is led by an extreme, thought provoking, wall-breaching, Spirit filled prophetess. Also there was a great friend of mine who is a phenomonoly gifted teacher, proclaimer, purpose finding, lesson living truth seeker. That being said, you will understand how I reached this point tonight. I was asked what my name meant (how THOUGHT PROVOKING), and of course shouted out the blatant obvious of how I live in it..."DIRT" yes maam, my name means dirt.Since then the TRUTH has been SEARCHED out and more has come to light (one may even say the light of day or DAWN). (see why I explained the two at the begining? now you know where they each fit in without my having to dialogue lol). Turns out the following is true:

Tera- Dirt, Earth

h- exhale, the outbreathing, or as in the breath of life God breathed into Adam, or the way He changed the names of Abram and Sarai to include His breath of life into AbraHam and SaraH

Jane- Merciful

God has spoken over a name of ordinary uselessness and turmoil with His breath, His essence, to cause life to spring forth from this pile of dirt to proclaim mercy to the ends of the Earth. If that does not cause me to live in the promise, I do not know how else to be inspired to seek truth or live in His exhale.

Just to add another point, my name at birth was :
Jacqueline- protector

For any of you who really know me or have endeavored to breach my walls, you understand how hard I strive to not be KNOWN, I am a protector of myself and am at this point in my life being called to relinquish that hold I covet over my own pride and secrecy and illusion of security through hiding. I have recently come to realize that I have wanted a life of masquerade parties and basement living in every sence of the meaning they imply.
But, just as my earthly name was changed, so it will be again.
We are told in Revelation that we will be given a new name written on a stone, known only to us by the creater of life Himself. TRUE Father will give us our purposed name when it has been fulfilled.
Turns out you cannot be a protector of self AND an effective proclaimation of His mercy to all the earth at the same time. How appropriate that the name given to me by my earthly father meant protector and when he abandoned his post as my earthly protector it was changed to a name in which my purpose was exhaled over me by my Heavenly Father. A name that will cause me to break the chains of self preservation and proclaim His name and great mercy to the ends of the Earth!